I have to smile when I read other people recounting their experiences as a Lightworker, and then I sigh, heavily. Most people paint a picture that is filled with gratitude, and a happy ending. An honest Lightworker or maybe a true one would give you a different story. Now there are different levels of Lightworkers, so perhaps these are the tales of those with light duties, but lightworking is often filled with obstacles and dilemmas.
First of all, a charge needs assistance either because they have no one else to help, maybe they can’t see or accept they need help, or there are others around them that prevent them getting help (enablers or foe). When there are all three, it’s indeed a task, and at times like this, one can feel tired and drained, and even question why they are helping and may consider quitting.
Several of my charges have had at least two of the criteria mentioned, and it’s that mental block that can be the greatest hurdle. While one doesn’t wish to look as if they are ‘brainwashing’ the charge, time is of the essence in most cases and to an outsider, friends or family maybe jealous or suspicious. That’s one hurdle—to garner trust without looking as if you are dominating or controlling events. In the past this has occurred, but the family members knew I had the best interests of the person at heart, and often I would involve them and tell them what was happening in a round about sort of way.
Currently, I have a huge challenge and one that has made me rethink my role. An elderly neighbor, (well off) who is a spinster with no family is terminally ill, and wishes to retain an element of independent living, yet her friends are using her and don’t take her needs into consideration. I don’t know whether she is getting dementia or putting up with it so as to keep her friends, or to be a people pleaser, but each time they make demands on her, the work I have done to help her stay alive and safe goes back a step. In some ways I have to question whether this is one of her final lessons to learn, and do I spell it out (I have done diplomatically) or let her fall and find out the hard way? My dilemma is that she will literally fall, and then may die. Besides this, all my energies have been taken up balancing the diplomacy, but I fear a more direct approach is needed now. I have done this before, and spelled it out literally to others and it hasn’t always gone down well.
Eventually, most people will reluctantly admit they need help, not in so many words, but by listening and acting on what you advise. That takes time, and sometimes a charge will go away and return months later, having considered what was said. Another hurdle are those who enable the situation for their own gains. They don’t wish the charge to have assistance, or they don’t think assistance is required. Having a friend or family member feeding thoughts that aren’t in the best interests of the charge is one of the most difficult obstacles—it shouldn’t be a case of which party to side with, but to work effectively, dealing with obstacles that a charge won’t remove makes it difficult and frustrating.
I’ll give you a real life example; one of my current charges needed to go to the Post Office to return a faulty item—it was easy, post paid and with a ready to seal bag. Her ‘foe friend’ decided to take her out, or rather to go out and take her with her for company as she didn’t like to drink in a café alone. She asked if they could stop at the Post Office to drop off the packet. The ‘foe friend’ said she didn’t have time, even though they passed two Post Offices on the way, went shopping for shoes (near a Post Office), had tea in a café, visited the bank, and went grocery shopping in a supermarket. They were out for over five hours, yet the ‘foe friend’ didn’t have 5-10 minutes to spare to help her friend with an errand. Is that a real friend? I posed that very question to my neighbor, which was met with silence.
You may think what is the big deal; well, the elderly friend has limited mobility, and is due to visit hospital in less than 48 hours and may have to stay over if her procedure doesn’t go well. When people have a low immune system with a terminal illness and need to have an emergency surgical procedure, the wisest thing to do is to rest and keep the body healthy. My fear is that all the help I have given has been undone by the selfish actions of the ‘foe friend’, and it makes me question whether I should continue to help? Each time the ‘foe friend’ drags her out, the elderly neighbor becomes ill, weak, and suffers, and I pick up the pieces and get her back on track. I have decided I must stop, even if that means she ends up in hospital. Some lessons need to learned the hard way even when they have spelt out literally.
Being a Lightworker has inner and external conflicts always—how far do you go, and when do you draw the line? Is that quitting or helping them learn a lesson that they fail to acknowledge? I see my role is helping others complete the Soul Goals and lessons they are facing. It’s hard when you see them so close, and then they slip back. My heart sank a little when my elderly friend admitted the ‘foe friend’ was an issue, only to hear her on the phone agreeing to allow her to come over later that day. I knew that she would get dragged out, and that she would be exhausted and in pain later on. She still hasn’t learned, and I decided to have a rest because picking up the same pieces is frustrating. This time tomorrow she has to go into hospital and an ambulance will pick her up, and I have offered to help her when she returns. Perhaps I need to put aside my own frustrations, because it’s her lesson to learn, but it is my energies and time that are being drained. Life as a Lightworker will have mental and physical hurdles, and the problem is often there is no one to tell, but know you are not alone. Maybe a timely reminder that not all can be saved, nor can every Soul learn or see what is obvious to the Lightworker?