It doesn’t matter how advanced you are spiritually, but remaining strong on the physical realm is a constant challenge for all of us. What we see or hear is not always true, honest or accurate. Here are a few ways that can help you to remain strong, even when everything is against you, or when no one believes you and self-doubt begins to trickle its way in:
Learning to trust your intuition is a work in progress, and there will be times you may get things wrong. Perhaps you were influenced by external forces (a recommendation or persuaded with words), or you wanted to see or believe what was in front of you? When you trust your intuition you must have courage to follow it, even when no one else agrees or there is no basis for what you feel and think. It has happened to me several times, and as cautious as you remain, the end result will happen no matter what. On one occasion I was working in a residential location where a senior member of staff was given their own cabin. I asked how long they had it for, and they replied ‘Forever’. For some reason I told them that would not be the case, and advised them to have a backup plan and look elsewhere. No one could have predicted a year later, they were given two weeks notice to leave with no job or place to live, as there was no reason given.
Step outside, look and question
At times when things look all wrong, or there is conflicting information, and you own intuition is clouded, you must step back and outside, and look at the whole picture. Too many of us only look at what concerns us, and sometimes the whole picture can change not only how things are perceived by the parties, but also the ultimate and best outcome for all. Resist trying to make snap decisions based on what you know, and look for information not offered. There may have been a good reason why information was not forthcoming, and will alter how you see things and also your reactions. Don’t be afraid to ask questions, because if people are reluctant or afraid to answer, ask yourself what are they hiding? You can’t make the best decisions with partial knowledge, and never be pressured to react.
Have Faith in yourself
Learning how to listen to yourself even when your intuition is clouded, can give you that boost of strength you need. Friends maybe well-meaning, but there are few that can impart advice that only you know deep down whether it is helpful or not. I have had friends who have told me I am too old to do go into another career, others who proffer advice on relationships (unasked for), and those who don’t know the real me, but think they know better. It doesn’t matter whether you succeed in what you do, or have gained a level that others consider successful, but that you did what you wanted to and not what others wanted. Knowing yourself—your strengths, desires and ambitions are only things you will understand, and having the courage and faith to do things for you, regardless of what others think or say, can only make your Soul stronger. It’s your life and if it doesn’t affect them, why would you let others have a say in things?
Listen, Stop, Think, and then Act
It’s human to get angry, confused, or annoyed, but all you can do is to try and control it. As I say, act rather than react. Learn to listen, and even if the information is flawed you can then dismiss it, but rather than rush, stop and then think. Consider what is best for you without harming others, and if someone acted and you consider their actions unwarranted, put yourself in their shoes and see why they either said what they did, or why they behaved in such a manner. It may not be right, but you can see why they reacted as they did. Acting is different from reacting as you are choosing to act rather than respond to an action. In a way it’s taking some control back, and empowers you as it gives you strength to take action for yourself. If someone tells you do something and it only serves their interests and not yours, then why do it? Instead you empower them, and not yourself. Think before you act, and when you do, have a reason for doing so, and not because someone told you do it or it was the easy way out.
Don’t get angry at yourself
Nothing is worse than when you get angry at yourself for not doing something, or thinking of something and not saying anything. Yes, be kind to yourself and see it as a step to gaining more trust in your intuition. We can’t be responsible for everything or everyone—each person has to take some responsibility for their own actions or inactions, even if you have the opportunity or ability to help or prevent a situation. This is one of the most difficult things to do; not to be too hard on yourself. It’s okay to make a mistake, or even go against your intuition. I have done this on occasions where I wanted to give others a chance or the benefit of the doubt. In the end I know I gave others a chance, even though my intuition was right. So things were delayed a little, but I created an opportunity of learning for another. Even when you are right, you can’t force others to see what you can, and the classic ‘I told you so’, occurs, but most spiritual people won’t say that (we may think it, but don’t say it even if the other party knows that’s what you are thinking). Understanding you can’t control everything can be hard when you can see a potential disaster, but remember, you can only help those who wish to be helped, and only those who are open to hearing will listen to you.
Staying strong requires some tongue biting, patience, and hard work in knowing whether to say something or not. Strength lies not only in actions, but also inactions and what is unsaid, because to be spiritually strong is about knowing your boundaries. Figuring out if and what to say, how, and when is a skill. Then also whether to act, or remain on the sidelines, and resisting the urge to jump in and help by saying ‘No’, because while one wishes to help, you can help by allowing others to grow stronger from falling. All of us grow strong from picking ourselves up and learning the harsh lessons of humanity—we cannot protect everyone all of the time, but you can protect yourself, and you deserve it.
©2016. S. T. Alvyn.